Live not memorex 

Teenager: the ages 13-18 (sometimes until age 20( the years in which your children seem to lose the capacity to understand the English language, even the smallest statements render teenagers to thinking their parents  are from another planet speaking an unknown language  that even Marvin the Martian can’t understand.

By simply stating  “I have not one but two  teenagers” to most older people, you get that sympathy look you do not want,  “Ohh, I’m so sorry, it will get better when they are just a bit older, hang in there”.

Of course, there will be parents who say they have no issues at all with their kids in their teens.  Now really?   I think these are the same parents who bragged that their infant’s slept through the night since birth and that’s the same parents (moms)  who say natural childbirth is no big deal.

Newsflash: these are just awful and cruel exaggerations.  The thing these parents don’t realize that we know it’s an exaggeration and would actually respect them more if you could own up to it.  There is no perfect child just as there is no perfect parent. Still we hear these stories of perfection.  I think they must not of slept at all during the whole  infancy stage to leave them making shit up like that.            One time I actually said, “isn’t that’s the biggest line of bullshit I’ve ever heard”

 While learning to navigate this thing called life, both parents and their children have moments  that makes no sense  at all.  Like why your kid makes up a story that is outrageous and obviously not true, but doesn’t realize you know exactly what’s going on and remind them gently that they are giving you a load of bullshit and maybe try the  truth, it can’t be that bad.  When they come clean, it isn’t bad at all.  Silly child doesn’t think momma was ever young and has done a few things herself like this.  Kids just don’t think straight during the teen years, it is enough to make anyone crazy.    Even my own mom said she’d like to have had us, especially my younger brother, cryofrozen until the age of 18 because all three of us about made her go coo-coo.

So I lived through his practice driving event…

I was only scared about  25 times because we were going to run off the road into the ditch, hit every car  parked on the right side of every  road, about scare to death all  the old  farts who were waking their dogs just as we ran them over and use a whole tank of gas just cuz we like to “gun it” “put the pedal to the metal” like Smoky & the Bandit!

 I will say he is the best kid ever, just like your child.  I will say he’s smart as a tack, just like your child.  I will say that he & his isister are funnier than any comedian I’ve ever seen or heard,  quick witted and smart assy like you wouldn’t believe, just like your child maybe.     I will say he makes the most retarded mistakes, just like your child.  I will say that he and his sister are by far the two best things I have ever done or will ever do  in my lifetime, just like you will say.  And they drive me wholeheartedly bananas while they fill my heart with love like I never knew existed.

I have heard people say that if they could just  go back and do something different perhaps they wouldn’t make the same mistakes they would try and get a different outcome.  Well,  I cannot agree, no not all.  No way I’d go back and even peek at the “do-over.”  I married an alcoholic, trust me wasn’t fun by any means, but here’s the thing; if I hadn’t married him I would t have these two kids, they are my lifeline, they are my story, they are “my human diary”  so I’d absolutely not got back.

We have all had good and bad getting where we are, I am grateful and blessed by this family I have created.  Troy and I are just really having the time of our lives seeing. these two grow up and all of their “firsts.”


19 thoughts on “Live not memorex 

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