Nick knack paddy whack give a dog a bone

In our home supper time and the time before it while it’s being prepared, has always been a family gathering filled with music, dancing, and an overall happy and  fun time to wind down from the rat race of our days.

Just last week, as I began this process I happen to be alone when Thing#2 came home.  “Hey, take the dog out real quick I’m almost done here, then we can eat when the boys get home”   I hear a “Sure Momma..”

As I went back to the music and the cooking, suddenly she’s back in the kitchen with both her and the dog looking all wide eyed while she’s kinda shouting, rambling and I wasn’t exactly understanding what she is trying to tell me.

He just crunched it!  Im so Not kidding MOM!!!!!  It’s not dead!!  Ewwwww!!!!  Wheres TROY?????  MOOOMMMM ITS NOT DEAD YET AND HE CRUNCHED IT!!  I was just standing there and turn around and he CRUNCHED it like Daniel’s DOG!! He’s like CUJO!!  MOM ARE YOU LISTENING???

Why yes, yes I am but I have no idea what you are trying to tell me darlin.  Now, it’s perfectly clear to me, the dog has just done something……attacked and “crucnched” something?.  What I am not getting is exactly what.  What was it?  Not my neighbors dog again …(a God awful story..).  Awe, shit!!

It’s RIGHT THERE!!!  It’s flipping around! Where’s Thing#1?? WHERE IS TROY????  It’s a baby MOM!!

A baby what??   She is forcibly pointing almost thru the back door window as if i could see “it.”  Praying my dog hadn’t just contracted rabies or a cotton mouth bite, I look at him and her making sure no ones hurt.  Finally she says not quite calmed down, still a scared voice but she’s making sense now.

 It’s a baby opossum!!  It got near me and he killed it!!!!  Go kill it, it’s not dead yet!!  WHERES TROY??????  He’s GOTTA get it!!
I am SO not taking him back outside!!!!  Mom it’s cute and he killed it, damn dog!!

She’s clearly upset, I get it, last thing she thought would happen. I look at my dog and he is just feeding off her anxiety here and wanting back outside.  Oh hell no dog, that ain’ta happening!!

But wait, a second…. cute??   The dog is Cujo and the opossum is cute? ???   Next she will want a pet opossum… Uh, No.   What I am picturing in my mind is not cute in any way, shape or form
I see this:

NOT this:

This is cute:

 This is NOT ::

    Hell NO Opossum

Where does Pinterest even get a photo like that? In the back woods, three miles  down in a holler??

By the time Troy and Thing #1 return home, she had calmed down and was just looking thru the window.  Towards the door steps Troy and Thing#1….KABOOM!  Here we go again!  I can’t help but giggle about it, she tickled me hearing the story again:  the dog renamed Cuju, how the dog recused her from imminent danger from a small, young opossum who was described as cute.

Never a dull moment….

Good Boy Cujo, good boy!



25 thoughts on “Nick knack paddy whack give a dog a bone

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