Misadventures of Bonnie and Clyde: Walking, talking Murphy’s law…

  

Oh no, this wouldn’t start anything in my house, not at all. No one would want to even try to squirt ketchup or mustard in his or her siblings face accidentally getting it in his or her eyes which would somehow cause the worst allergy attack because of course someone is allergic to vinegar (yes there is vinegar in ketchup & mustard) As I am guiding him or her to the car  

 screaming because his or her sibling has blinded them and they will pay for their mistake for the rest of their lives as his or her brother then screams louder “IN YOUR FACE!!” Just as I trip over one of the four cats we have and the first screaming child then starts screaming “AAACK MOMMMM!” proving the first screaming child is, in fact, not blind as a bat, so the second screaming child frantically yells “He or she SO IS NOT BLIND! LIAR!! A LIAR!!” ad he or she is pointing about in  

 his or her face and then poked him or her in the eye just as our mutant dog decides to join the fun due to the fact someone didn’t close the damn door but then decides he is just gonna run away and runs like a bat out of hell as he sees our neighbor walking  

 eatinb a hot dog from the gas station in their Smurf Halloween costume and  then the dog  decides he is just gonna have some lunch and **swoosh**** gone “run like the wind Bullseye” as I realize I just locked the keys inside the car because screaming child one is now sobbing because he or she “really CANT SEE”   He or she says I am wrong yet he or she sees his or her dog running down the street  and kinda yells half singing to the Smurf “RUN Cujo isa coming to eat you! NAN NA NAN NAAANA!” the rest of us turn to see the dog who is making a beeline for the Smurfs foot and screaming/singing first child, screaming second child and my self simultaneously start chanting “Throw the hot dog!!Hurry! NOW!! THROW IT!!!!!!” 

Throw the hot dog already!! <-look

At which point screaming/singing first child and screaming second child and I all start cheering because the dog actually caught the hot dog and ate it in one bite  and the three of us just cheered!  YAY! He caught it!  

As I turned around to see Troy looking pale as a ghost as he just sits down on our porch in pure disbelief of what he just saw happen in front of him… 

 
All of which seemed as if it was completely in slow motion and took about two days for this heartwarming and fulfilling experience to really take place
  

So

the $20 spent on four ketchup and mustard guns is well worth the experience and joy that they bring to a family near you  If you survive, you had fun I bet! 
   

 

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