Tag Archives: honesty

‘the keeper’

Sometimes when we read someone else’s words they hit you deep down in your guts directly to your soul, these words did exactly that.  They paused me.  They made me remember my job, “the keeper

I had bracelets made for both my kids, I wear my sons, one day I’ll give it to him but for know I am the keeper of the message “ain’t no mountain high, no valley low” the song I played them so much during a very hard time in our lives, the divorce.  We are years passed that now, however, old wounds die hard and long sometimes so it is just a reminder that through it all, good and bad, they could always count on their keeper

It certainly is the little things that we know to keep this lil sailboat  sailing like a Viking battleship ​

One of our silly videos to fully embraced our motto ​



“I am the keeper.

I am the keeper of schedules. Of practices, games, and lessons. Of projects, parties, and dinners. Of appointments and homework assignments. 

I am the keeper of information. Who needs food 5 minutes before a meltdown occurs and who needs space when he gets angry. Whether there are clean clothes, whether bills are paid, and whether we are out of milk. 

I am the keeper of solutions. Of bandaids and sewing kits and snacks in my purse. But also of emotional balms and metaphorical security blankets. 

I am the keeper of preferences. Of likes and dislikes. Of nightly rituals and food aversions. 

I am the keeper of reminders. To be kind, to pick up their trash, to do their dishes, to do their homework, to hold open doors and write thank you notes.

I am the keeper of rituals and memories. Of pumpkin patches and Easter egg hunts. I am the taker of pictures, the collector of special ornaments, and the writer of letters. 

I am the keeper of emotional security. The repository of comfort, the navigator of bad moods, the holder of secrets and the soother of fears. 

I am the keeper of the peace. The mediator of fights, the arbiter of disputes, the facilitator of language, the handler of differing personalities.

I am the keeper of worry. Theirs and my own. 

I am the keeper of the good and the bad, the big and the small, the beautiful and the hard. 

Most of the time, the weight of these things I keep resembles the upper elements on the periodic table – lighter than air, buoying me with a sense of purpose.

But sometimes the weight of the things I keep pulls me down below the surface until I am kicking and struggling to break the surface and gasp for breath.

Because these things I keep are constantly flickering in the back of my brain, waiting to be forgotten. They scatter my thoughts and keep me awake long past my bedtime.

Because all these things I keep are invisible, intangible. They go unnoticed and unacknowledged until they are missed. They are not graded or peer reviewed or ruled on by a court. And sometimes they are taken for granted. 

My husband and my boys are kind and generous and they love me hard. And this is by far the greatest job I have ever had. But sometimes being the Keeper is exhausting. Because you feel like you’re doing it alone. 

So to all of you who are keepers, I see you. 

I know the weight of the things you keep. 

I know the invisible work you do, which doesn’t come with a pay check or sick leave, is what makes the world go round. 

I see you.

And I salute you.”

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Credit: Lucky Orange Pants


Riding in cars with boys 


What? Exactly who are we picking up?
*the boys
Uh What boys?
*the boys they both like
And I’m learning this now, why?
*because they need a ride and you’d prolly say no

I say be glad she asked to pick them up versus acting like no boys were involved in the trip to the movies.  I am okay with picking the boys up and you are too Troy, she telling us and being very honest; can’t beat that one!!

I’m navigating through life here trying to keep the peace, most days it is just flipping hilarious.  The three of them never stop picking at each other. It’s very comical, I cannot even tell you how many times a day I hear the phrase “In your face..!!!”   Not one is innocent of it, right up until someone gets mad.  So I can’t even say how many times that I say, “someone’s gonna get mad….and it won’t be me….”   All hell breaks loose when one of the crosses over the line into the  “oh no you didn’t just say THAT!!” zone.

At Sunday supper with my parents, they started, my mom looked at me with a grin from ear to ear as she listens to the three of them, my dad even looks up from his plate a lot just grinning.  I just whisper “it never stops”. The sass coming out of their mouths is relentless.  I catch my parents giggling sometimes.   There are a few favorites used by all three: you big turd, this is a family favorite I think, it makes us laugh because my brother has used that one since he was about five..  I’ve heard so many wonderful descriptive words when they start, it’s hard to keep track. Topping each other is the goal.  I don’t think they notice everyone around them laughing.   Someone is always just a bit more retarded than the other, one can always fart louder too, and burp louder AND  longer and you will be privy to the examples and may even be asked to judge the winner.  Which you should never, ever, ever succumb  to, oh no keep  your judging to yourself little Momma!!  I do, I just smile or snort depending on how outlandish it gets, sometimes crossing over to gross especially when it’s the burps and the farts.

The funny thing is, this is family time, ALL the time.  We all sit and just truly laugh out loud and sometimes feel that we really are ROFLMAO and cannot stop.

Day in the life of us is filled with so much laughter you’ll feel you may pee your are laughing so hard daily,  honesty, trust,  and a helluva lot of love,, sure can’t get enough of all of them!  Life is good, well,  that is an understatement!
My son…makes me proud!  Oh Lordy…

Oh my….I should be so proud.  *

***Occasionally you see the red print, that justifies some sort of added bonus, a clip, a song, just a little something that has made us smile

Amongst Men

 Thing#1 asks his Papa a few questions today and my dad says, “one day he’d sit down and tell him all about it..”   As this kinda perplexed my son as to why not now?  My Daddy began to tell him all about it right then. I just sat listening to my Dad tell Thing #1 about family,  what family means, and exactly why he was telling him.  My mom and I looked at each other more than once in this discussion, just acknowledging to each other and to my son the truth my Dad was speaking.  When my Dad was done talking, I then asked my son one simple question,  “Now do you understand exactly why I am the way I am?”     I have heard that story now a few times in my life. The last time was almost six years ago in our driveway 1000 miles from where I stand today when my Dad gave his facts of life the way he saw it and expected it to be to Troy, which Troy found absolutely reasonable as he shook my daddy’s hand that day.

I’ve told my kids these things as well, however, when it’s spoken by my Dad, that makes this, well I don’t quite have a word for it,  when my Dad speaks, we listen.  What he says just IS, like family law or something.  Sounds extreme, well it is.  Family is well defined, expectations of everyone, respect for everyone, it’s a package deal, it is how I was raised so I find none of it oddball at all.  I know that when Troy’s father has spoken to just me numerous times or even to my kids, we all  gave undivided attention and full respect to the conversations because that’s exactly what I was taught to do and the moment when you see their words true, that much more respect is given.  None of this is unheard of.  Now, if someone starts telling you bat shit crazy, twisted ideas of family, well, that is a different story, we all will excuse ourselves from that person forever.   By no means am I Italian or related to the Gotti family, however, family is everything to ours and my dad just happens to be a helluva lot like Tony Soprano when dealing with outside sources as they pertain to his family and a few choice friends;  protective, serious, honest and loyal.  He can and will hit the ground running if he is crossed, and so will each of his children and also the love of his life, my own Momma.

When it comes right down to the heart of the matter, Thing#1 has some pretty fabulous men around him as roll models.  Men of character with heart and soul, who love fiercly and are not afraid to show their love; who protect instinctively they are not forced, and they do not attach strings to their love because it is unconditional.   They are certainly not afraid of the truth and always speak it and expect you to so the same; loyalty runs deep, it’s a part of them that is not questioned, it is in their blood so you do not have doubt because it’s in yours as well.  They are so very easily trusted and respected because that is exactly how they treat you, they are open and extremely honest, if you are in need of hearing the truth, well, hold up because they will give it and expect you to do the same.

This is just the men of my family. As  I decide to take on the ladies here and there, you will and perhaps have already seen that we are all that and a bag of chips and not plain old tater chips either!  Us ladies be those Spicy Sriracha, habanero tater chips dashed with ghost pepper flakes; a force to be reckoned with, a very fine hot mess that if you are extremely lucky, it only takes two hands to handle each of us.  Family is our everything, we stand stronger than the mafia boss because we give the mafia boss his strength.  Overstepping boundaries may not fair any person well,  tangoing with any of us, well it’s just not one of those fabulous ideas one could have.   “Forgive and forget” turns into “move along, but remember to not trust that one.”     The one single person that could bring  Tony Soprano down was his wife, Carmella.